See this guy? (DJ Sg)
Want him to play your requests? Then give him a little respect!
(If the DJ is really bad however or if the music is consistently not your taste then you'll do yourself a favor by leaving the club and find a new place to party at. If you're stuck at this venue because you have to be there then keep reading this guide.)
What NOT to do:
1) NEVER COMPLAIN. You ever do someone a favor after they complained to you about how you do things? Thought so. Don't say things like "play something I can dance to" or "something with a beat". Whining does not help your case either so don't say things like "everyone wants to hear it" or "come on I'll get some action if you play this!" or "play this soon because we're leaving". People just don't like whiners, DJs included.
2) BE SPECIFIC. You can't ask to see what they DJ has or ask him what he has. With more dj's augmenting their music library with hard drives it's not impossible for a DJ to have 100,000 songs. You really plan to scroll through 100,000 songs like a jukebox? If you don't know the song title or artist don't attempt to sing to the DJ he or she will not be able to hear you! The DJ has a monitor speaker right next to her AND headphones on!
As a side note the DJ does not always have 100% complete control over the music. The club owner or promoter may have given him guidelines he must stick to in order to get paid.
What you SHOULD do:
1) SAY PLEASE! Come on now, if you're going to say "can I please have..." when ordering from McDonald's you can say please to the DJ!
2) Write the DJ a note. It is WAY easier to read than hear in the club. Best thing to do is type your request out with song title and artist on your cell phone. The backlight of the cell phone will help the DJ read your request. When I try to do a request I usually say something like "You're kicking ass tonight! If you have it, please play (artist - title) thanks!"
Bonus: You can tip a DJ like a bartender to get better service, ask her if you can buy her a drink because sometimes even when she has drink tickets she can't leave the turntables to get a drink!
The San Diego City Beat recently ran this article here that proves that women drink a whole lot more than usual and more than their male counterparts at themed parties.
Is it too much of a stretch to say that women also demand and enjoy theme parties more then men? Try asking the closest female right now and I'd put down $20 that she says "I love theme parties!"
Half the fun is from dressing up and the other half of the fun is being something you're not for a while. It's the same novelty as Halloween with out waiting for October! It's everyone's favorite holiday (even if only secretly because most people will still answer Christmas) because parties can get very wild. Easily Halloween has eclipsed Mardi Gras as being more decadent. Mardi Gras is best in New Orleans but there's an awesome Halloween scene in all major cities.
Now if we share similar goals to have amazing parties I'll give you the number one rule to follow with themed events. 100% ENFORCE THE THEME! Any theme party where people get to break the theme makes guests feel cheated for their efforts. Even having one person will nullify the crazyness multiplier effect of having 100% participation.
Enforcement can be a gamble with your friends. Denying someone entry to a party can stir up drama between you and your lazy guest. Send out invitations selectively and put your foot down on the 100% rule! If the rules are the same for everyone then you can claim to be fair.
There's two camps when it comes to bottle service "never in a million years" and "as much as I can afford it I'll do it!" Here's most of the complaints I hear...
On the against side the arguments are:
"complete waste of money"
"it's only for rich people who want to look cool"
"I don't want to be away from the action"
and the arguments for:
"it saves money"
"looking cool is fun!"
"It's the only way to guarantee a place to sit"
but always one response when there is a bottle to be shared.
"YAY DRINKS!"
So who's right and who's wrong? More importantly how can you maximize having more "yay drinks!" moments? It just takes a little analysis and a tiny bit of math to figure out this conundrum. Which is also why people stay bias for one side or against since planning out how to have fun is counter intuitive!
I ask everyone first why are they considering getting a bottle. Does the occasion and people involve benefit from getting a bottle? Is it economically feasible? For example if it's for someones birthday would that group of people be able to finish a whole bottle and would the birthday person would want to get everyone into the bottle area? Find these answers before going on to the next step of research.
Every club is different with their bottle service rules and prices. It's always a good idea to ask for a bottle price sheet. Prices usually vary depending on who's promoting that night, sales, alcohol sponsors, special guests or performances. One day things can be 3x the usual price or 2 for 1! Also sometimes gratuity is added even though you pour your own drinks! Then ask for what comes included. The industry standard is to provide two mixers, ice, and a few energy drinks. These are usually refillable.
The rules for how many people can share a bottle are also different for each venue. There are several different combinations of limiters you can have. I'll list some of the common ones starting with the most restrictive . The area with your bottle may be in a separate area of the club with limited access to only designated people. You're charge extra for anyone extra who hangs out in your vip area or table. You're given a vip area or table that's too small to accommodate all your friends but you're allowed to have any combination of people come in and out. Lastly is simply just the bottle and a table.
SO... time to work some math. If you have a free for all situation or are able to bring people to the table then just divide the bottle price of the bottle by the acceptable amount people are willing to pay each. If you're limited to say 5 people to a bottle divide bottle price by 5. So lets say $300/5 = $60. Now, compare that to the average bar tab you have at the end of the night. If you spend more or around the amount you should think about getting a bottle more often.
If you want more people to chip in you can defeat most limitations in this manner. Just make sure you have a friend who is competent enough to serve drinks. The last thing you want is a guy as pictured above! I would ask my friends to put in $20 for 4 drinks or more depending on how much I can hook it up. If you can't get extra cups for your table have your friend buy a drink at the bar, finish it, then use that cup to serve them. This dramatically lowers cost per person and everyone pays less than they would at the bar.
One last point so that I can silence the haters who say I'm just blowing my money. The number 1 thing you're buying is time. Here's a reasonable example if you're buying 4 drinks in one night at 15 minutes wait time a drink a bottle will save you a whole hour of your night. When prime club time is 11pm-1am that hour can make or break your night.
To sum it up (cause this got a whole lot longer than I planned)
1. PLAN AHEAD! If only I can drill this in the head of every friend!
2. Do some research. Bottle prices and VIP/Table Rules.
3. Figure out if it's worth it.
Have fun out there!
I was at an 80s house party / birthday / roommate house warming tonight. It was an interesting cultural change in night life as 80% of the party was very apparently lesbian. I say cultural because this is not about girls getting "gaysted" but actually flirting between two gay women. Definitely no one going "whoooo!" when two ladies were making out and I was even able to continue on a serious conversation about a hosts expectations on himself while two women explored 3rd base together.
The big thing that hit me time and time again that night was how easy it was for people to ask each other "is that your girlfriend?" or "are you single?" These questions never came across as they would in a heterosexual man and women setting. It almost ALWAYS seem like the question comes up in a "I'm trying to hit on you" way because that piece of personal information can very well dramatically change someones behavior towards you.
It appeared to make people more comfortable knowing upfront what kind of boundary to have with one another. The question was never made anyone feel uncomfortable in any way. Usually finding out someone's relationship status takes some snooping if the answer is not obvious and asking just seems like a potential mine field.
One time I was at a BBQ and one of my highschool buddies turned actress (black girl about 2:36 into the video.)
And she asked me how I can keep up with my lifestyle. She was telling me about how it was like shmoozing and trying to look good to get ahead in LA. So I was like hey we're good friends, I"ll give you some of my secrets to survive when you're just starting in the scene.
1) Thrift and Deep Discount Stores: The greatest thing about these places is that no one can copy your look. The hardest part is being able to choose what will not make you look cheap and not with the times.
2) Refuse to pay for parking: Valet and lot fees add up. Get used to walking. Not only is it good for you, no one is going to want to carpool with you so you'll never be late for number 4.
3) Pre-Game! also known as Pre-Party: Now that you're parked it's time to break out the alcohol. It also nice to have conveince store cups to mix the drinks in so you can walk to the club with drink in hand. Also, alcoholic slurpees taste way better than you can imagine.
4) Get on the guestlist: It's so easy to get on the guest list for clubs that you will become easily spoiled to not paying cover ever. The email is usually right on the flyer. Just send your full name in and get there early!
Advanced Tip: If I come to a bar in downtown I can easily spend $60 on a tab just for myself. All you need is 6 more people and you can buy a $300 VIP bottle and pay for tax and gratuity. VIP service and the amount of drinks you can make with a single bottle is way more worth it than spending $60 on yourself. Sometimes there's even 2 for 1 deals on bottles.
There was time where I had this guy named Neo on staff doing web design and photography for my events. He did an impression of me at a party running around making sure everything is ok while stressing out about everyone having a good time. He would bounce back and forth, turn his head worriedly this way and that, then point at imaginary people and say "are you ok? are you ok?" It's a trap a lot of hosts fall into because sometimes it's easier to stress yourself over the details than to have a good time!
I have since calmed down and have been able to enjoy myself more without jepordizing a single event. Parts of that attitude still cling on to me though. I was originally going to On Broadway for my friend Archie's friend Kimmie's birthday. When my friend Allision hits me up asking if they're on the list. I immediately replied with what list, what day, and what club. Turns out she mixed up the days I was trying to invite her out to downtown but she wanted to know what I was up to because her roomate Sophal's friends where in town from Nor Cal.
They were pre-partying at the appartment till 11:30 and finally started to make their way into downtown. I tried to set up a meeting spot in front of the entrance side bar but just like at V20 (a club in long beach) she was checking her phone at long intervals.
So my strategy was to stay in the downstairs hip hop room most of the time because everyone trys to get up in there. Thankfully we knew the bouncer Louis guarding that entrance so we could bypass that line. Swiming through the bodies that spilled all across the dance floor into adjacent areas I snuck by the VIP bouncer to get a better vantage point of the Karma Room. Also ran into my high school friend Jersey in one of the booths.
So this is what I need to learn. In the process of pushing my way through the crowd searching for my two friends I run into a group of 5 women.
Me: Excuse me (I push through a dancing couple and come upon a wall of women)
Girl 2#: Hiiii
Girl 3#: *winks*
Girl 4#: I like this *points at jacket*
Girl 1#: *Nudges girl 2, smiles, looks at me smiles, looks back at girl 2 smiles*
Girl 5#: Oh I love your jacket *flares jacket* and your hair! *pats head* oh and your glasses *resets frames*
Me: Umm Thanks *pushes through*
15 minutes later: Why the fuck didn't I stop and chat?!
Sigh...sadly not the first time I've done this but this is the first time I'm actually adressing it as a problem and vowing to not do that again.
When it's not my event, and if I'm meeting friends that brought their own friends, there is no mission to meet up with them. If I made an effort to look then I fufilled my obligation.
It's like my friend who used to be a bouncer at a club. When he goes out he still has to watch out for fights. Hmm I should make another blog about industry complaints.
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